Taelin's 4th Birthday Party!

Last weekend we had Taelin's 4th birthday party and as requested by her, we had a museum party.  Instead of going too crazy, I just asked her what she wanted for her cake, decorations, etc and then I added a few things.  We ended up not having as many people as we expected (several of the kids that we were planning on were sick and others had a change in plans) but we still had a great time!  My sister Lorie and her husband Charlie drove down from Seattle and Joe's mom flew in from Spokane.  We had a couple of close friends also in attendance and more than anything Taelin was happy at the end of her party!

Here are some pictures from the day...

She requested a cake that looked like an art palette.
Two stacked cakes, a sister that carved them into the shape
and a shot glass cutting the thumb hole and we had the shape.
 She picked the colors for the paint/frosting blobs and we were in business!

She requested her art to be the decorations so we did
some special for the party and used some of her old favorites and
again my sister helped and "artfully" put them up on the wall!

Balloon banner!  Thanks to Lorie...again! 

Rice Krispy Paintbrushes for favors for everyone!
Cut into squares, stuck on a tongue depressor (which you can't really see here)
 and then dipped in colored meltaways.
I wrapped them up individually and sent them off with each person!
Yummy and really darn cute!  

It was hard to find party hats that fit the theme...so I made some!
These were originally John Deere hats but they looked like Crayola
boxes so I just covered up the John Deere logo with a little help from my Cricut and glue dots! 

We had quite a few kids (7) planned to come until the day before the party so I had planned a few different art activities for them to do.  Taelin's friend Maddie was the only one that was able to make it so they did one of the little activities but then just ended up playing!  I did send Maddie home with a bag of loot!

My sister made an AWESOME frame with some crown moulding, wood glue and gold paint!
 We had a fun time getting some pictures using this frame!
 I would have like to get more but they were much more interested in playing!

Good looking sisters!

FUN!

Opening presents!

While we were singing!

Blowing out the candles!

We had a wonderful time celebrating a fantastic little girl!  

Photo A Day Feb. 18-25

What a week!  It feels like I say that every week, but seriously, what a week!  This week was pretty much all about Taelin turning 4 and getting ready for her party.  I felt like I needed to capture some of what our life looks like (because it is just going too bloody fast) and then of course, capture Taelin throughout the week.  

feb 18, 2013
current favorite board games

feb 19, 2013
I love it when Taelin noticed the clouds in the sky.
 Not surprising to anyone that knows her...
she was particularly excited about the pink clouds!

feb 20, 2013
one of her sippy cups that will probably soon no longer be needed

feb 21, 2013
rice krispy paintbrushes...favors for everyone at her party

feb 22, 2013
Birthday Girl is 4!!!

feb 23, 2013
I just realized that I didn't take this picture but I am using it anyway.
I took a TON of pictures at her party but this is by far my favorite...
 I think credit goes to my sister for this one.

feb 24, 2013
A little balancing act at Minto Brown Park

feb 25, 2013
babies, babies and more babies

Your birthday is a special time to celebrate the gift of 'you' to the world. - Author Unknown

It seems like it is almost my responsibility to take a few minutes tonight before I go to bed and think about the birthday that is coming tomorrow.  Taelin is turning 4.

This weekend is going to be a hustle and bustle of fun with family and friends.  Nana is flying in from Spokane tomorrow and my sister and Charlie are driving down from Seattle.  Taelin decided she wants to go have Mexican food for dinner on Friday and I am curious to see how she reacts to the loud singing and shaking tambourines when they come to sing "Happy Birthday" to her at the table.  I wonder I am going to react. (I have cried every time we have "officially" sang on years 1, 2 and 3....I doubt this year will be different.)

Saturday we have even more family coming down from Portland, as well as some of our close friends, for Taelin's official birthday party.  We originally had 6 other kids coming but sadly, we are down to 2 and Taelin.  I think though that Taelin will have fun....all of her favorite people are going to be in one place.  It is going to be the most awesome museum party ever.  Pictures will definitely follow this weekend.

I am sure that before I know it that the next couple of days will be over.  And while Taelin is so excited to turn 4, I am having mixed feelings.  On one hand, I am so incredibly proud of the person she is.  Of course she is a preschooler and has an unpredictable nature in different situations that is going to give her lots of opportunity to learn .  She has taught me more in the last 4 years about the kind of person that I want to be than I think I had even learned in any of my years previous.  I am excited to see what '4' will bring!

On the other hand, Taelin turning 4 makes me sad.  If I thought that there was any part left of my baby this time last year, the baby is gone now for sure.  It seems so cliche to say "Time goes by so fast." but man...4 years already.  Never again will I have a 3 year old.  Clearly we have been getting closer to this day but there is just something so permanent about the whole thing that makes me tear up every time I think about it.

There have been a lot of, "Well, when I am 4 I am not going to be able to (enter cute adorable thing) anymore," or "You know Mama, when I am 4 I am going to be able to (enter thing that I am used to doing for her) without your help."  The other day she came out of her room completely dress all by herself from her night pull-up and nightgown to ready to go out the door.  She doesn't really need me for that anymore.  And my heart breaks a little bit.

But I am trying to focus on what is great about this birthday. Celebrate the person she is and who she is going to be this coming year.  She still needs me, it is just in a different way.  I cling to that, hoping that it will always be true.

I love her with everything I am and I hope that she knows that.  I think she does.  What an amazing little girl I have.  I am so grateful every day that I get to be her Mama.

It is 12:02 a.m.  I officially am a Mama of a 4 year old.

Photo A Day Feb 9-17, 2013

What an incredible last week this has been!  As I look at the pictures that I took this week, I reminded how lucky I am to have to what I have.  I don't know if my photography is getting better (again all these pictures are taken with my phone) but I am getting an amazing record of my life.  That idea seems particularly important as we get ready to celebrate Taelin's 4th birthday and the idea of time "speeding by" seems to be at the forefront.  I think though, especially as I look at this week's pictures, that we are doing a good job of living our life.  I am incredibly lucky.

feb 9, 2013
I absolutely adorable this picture

feb 10, 2013
spent a glorious sunny afternoon tubing at HooDoo

feb 11, 2013
The blanket fort right before taking it down.
 Note the sleeping bag...Taelin slept there for 3 nights and would
have kept sleeping there for who know how long.
She was so sad when we took it down.

feb 12, 2013
The new blog that I started along with my two co-mentors

feb 13, 2013
A Pinterest idea that I executed horribly (the horrible part was not captured)

feb 14, 2013
chocolate fondue

feb 15, 2013
tulips poking up...thanks Nana!

feb 16, 2013
I went on a major cooking frenzy to cook up some food for a
co-worker that had her baby 4 weeks early.  (Everyone is good!)
As I was finishing cleaning up I quickly snapped a picture.
The beginning of the mess would have been much more impressive!

feb 17, 2013
And speaking of babies, here is a picture from our zoo trip
where we got to see the new baby elephant Lily for the first time.
ADORABLE!

Smile, breathe and go slowly. ~Thich Nhat Hanh

Oh man, how I needed this quote tonight.

My brain has been going a million miles a minute for the last two days and I just need to "smile, breathe, and go slowly".  There are too many things that I am trying to keep track of in the different aspects of my life and I can really tell.  I have no current to-do lists written down which mean it is just running through my head like a ticker tape.

There is just a perfect storm brewing between balancing prepping for Valentine's Day, Taelin's upcoming birthday party, my beginning teachers, my coworkers, Joe's added stress from work, my messy house...  I could keep going but I am going to smile, breathe and go slowly.

If I look at all of those things, I really haven't dropped any kind of ball really...but man, the guilt is oozing from my pores. For example, I usually make something for my teachers each month.  Nothing big, but something whether it is a little treat or holiday decoration and I didn't get anything done for January and thought V-Day would be my chance and this week has come and almost gone with me seeing my teachers empty handed.  And I feel guilty for that.

I was going to bake something to take to Taelin's preschool teachers for Valentine's Day.  I didn't.  I was going to put little gift baskets together for my friends that always get together around the holidays.  I have the baskets and one thing in them and no plans to see them soon.  One of them left the gift bag on my car in my driveway this morning.  Super sweet.  But really, she had to leave it on my car because I can't pull my crap together?  Super sad.

Taelin's birthday party is in 10 days.  And I just sent out the invitations today.  I think I have touched base with most people about it but I can't remember for sure.  Guilty, guilty, guilty.  I haven't even thought about presents, tried (and failed) to make those damn melted crayons things from Pinterest and other than a menu plan don't really have a plan.  Seriously, who burns crayons?!?

Work...well, there just isn't enough of me.  Everyone knows it.  Everyone is being very understanding.  But, honestly, that doesn't ease the guilt.  We (my other elementary mentors and I) started a new blog in hopes of connecting our teachers together in a different way.  It is super exciting but it has taken up my nights the last two nights.  Not so great for that whole balance thing.

And Joe...the poor guy is working a TON. He is getting home later than usually, eating dinner, helping Taelin with her bath and when I come out from tucking her in is upstairs working.  I feel guilty that he isn't coming home to a cleaner house and a less stressed out wife.

And I am not even going to get started on my house.  I am not even trying to go for "looking good" right now.  I am mostly going for "for the love of Pete just let me find my freakin' countertop because I need to make dinner" and barely getting that done.

...Inhale....Exhale....Inhale...Exhale...

I have probably stressed you out now haven't I.  Sorry about that.

I probably should just get off of here and go get some things done! I suppose that would help.  But what I really need to do is...

smile,
breathe
and go slowly

I think that "slowly" will start with some list making.  (And yes, I will add some things to the list that I have already done in an effort to help myself feel more productive.)

Ah...I feel better already.

Still Alice by Lisa Genova

Still Alice by Lisa Genova is a book that honestly hit a little too close to home.  Everyone else I know that has read this book has just thought it was amazing.  It just made me really uncomfortable most of the time.

Alice is a fairly young, Harvard professor with a husband that loves her and three grown children when she discovers that she has early-onset Alzheimer's.  The story is told from her perspective as she becomes increasingly aware of her disease's progression.

Growing up, my dad's uncle moved across the street from us and my mom became his primary caregiver. She took care of him long after was reasonable (in my opinion) and that entire experience was on my mind the entire time I was reading this book.  Taking care of him affected our small family in ways that I couldn't understand at the time but instead, because I was a teenager, just grew to resent.  There was plenty of resentment to go around from everyone.  Our family vacations stopped.  Even a day trip somewhere was pretty much out of the question.  Our life, schedule and overall mood in the house was determined by him and the care we had to provide.  And then I went to college, and from what I remember, it got even worse before my mom and dad finally decided it was too much for my mom and moved him into a nursing home.  There are still a lot of hard feelings around the whole thing and I would guess there always will be.  There was plenty of blame/martyrdom to go around so it really best to avoid the whole topic.  

But back to the book.  It was heartbreaking to read this story from the perspective of the woman with Alzheimer's.  There were times that I even cried.  But the title of book, and some of the premise of the story, is that even though she had this horrible disease, she was still herself.  Except for that at some point, that isn't really true.  Eventually, the person that was once there is completely gone.

Don't take my word for it.  I am admitting my known bias.  Goodreads reader's have rated the book a 4.24 with over 65,000 ratings.  Obviously a lot of people loved this book.  I just wasn't one of them.

Love life and life will love you back. Love people and they will love you back. - Arthur Rubenstein

Today was one of the best days I have had in a long time.  I went to the gym and had a really good run.  I had an eye appointment and then Joe, Taelin and I went out for lunch.  We did some shopping to get a few things we needed around the house.  We then spent about 3 hours in bed.  Joe and I took turns napping while the other entertained Taelin with iPad apps and books.  We got up and went to dinner (I didn't cook a thing today!) and when we got back we built a blanket fort which Taelin decided to sleep in for the night.

Nothing too exciting, right?  Well...probably not too exciting when I just type it out but I honestly wasn't looking for exciting.  I was looking for just "being".  It was absolutely just what I needed.  And, without even really planning it, I was able to check something off my list.  Here are some of the pictures that I snapped during the building of above mentioned blanket fort.

Pre-blanket fort picture

I didn't really know how serious Joe was going to get about this whole thing.

Easily my two favorite people!  Love them!

Adding a door.  She was slightly upset there wasn't a garage.

In case you can't tell, this is a pull-string light.

chillin'

The two things she decided to bring in the blanket fort: books and her lacing cards.

Final product.  Spoken as a true geek, Joe says this is the "beta" version.

I can't really put into words how much I love these two and how much I love my life with them.

EDITED 8:55 a.m. morning after:  Taelin slept in the blanket fort all night and when I woke up and wandered out to the kitchen around 8:00 I hear her call my name.  I go over and stick my head in and she is sitting with her stack of books beside her, a little frustrated that she can't read the words, but mostly enjoying what she called "the quiet morning time."  She is currently sitting in there playing puzzles...

Photo A Day Jan 29-Feb 8

It feels like a long time since I have given any real attention to my photos, but I was pleasantly surprised to see that I had actually taken a photo for each day since the last time I had posted.  Some of them aren't the best there ever was, but they certainly tell a story.  I don't know if anyone else will really remember the story, but I surely will.

jan 29, 2013
Taelin wrote a letter to a friend and wanted an envelope to put the address.
 My teacher friends will understand the proud mama moment for this one.

jan 30, 2013
I will admit that I didn't take this one until today,
but if I hadn't been in PowerPoint
 *HELL*
this is what I would have taken a picture of.

jan 31, 2013
I was taking anything that looked like sunshine 

feb 1, 2013

feb 2, 2013
San Jose!

feb 3, 2013
that is filled entirely with iced tea...and then I drank it...all

feb 4, 2013
Now that's sunshine!

feb 5, 2013
you had to be there

feb 6, 2013
home sweet home with lovely stacks of towels

feb 7, 2013
I see I am not the only anxious one about spring

feb 8, 2013
splatter painting for museum party decorations
(Lorie...you missed all the fun!)