Time for some gratitude...

I was really cranky yesterday afternoon.  I had a huge list of things I needed to get done, most of it cleaning around the house.  Taelin is exerting more independence every day, which is leading to a frustrated little girl when she can't do something she thinks she should be able to.  It was cloudy, again, instead of sunshiny.  I am starting to get excited and anxious about my trip to Montana and I had tripped on the damn step stool for the third time that day. Just as I tripped on my way to look at the list of cleaning I wanted to get done, I heard a cry from Taelin's bedroom a good hour before she should have even thought about waking up.  More cranky still....

And then I stopped.  I took a breath and then told myself to make a choice.  I could continue down this road of cranky, which just leads to more cranky for me and eventually those around me.  Or, I could stop, take moment and look at things differently.  

How lucky am I that I have a daughter that is growing and healthy?  One who feels safe enough in her environment to take risks and learn new things?  How lucky am I that I have a daughter at all?  

How lucky am I that I have a house to clean?  How lucky am I that I am home this summer, getting a chance to get caught up on all the things that were left behind this spring?  

The answer is that I am very lucky.  And grateful.  So incredibly grateful.  It is a shame that it is so easy to forget all I have.  Maybe not forget, but take for granted.  So here, in no particular order, are 10 things I am grateful for this week.

1.  Taelin: No matter how frustrated I can be with her, there is nothing in my life I am more thankful for.  This time seems to be going so incredibly fast it makes me sad to think about.  I need to leave the list of "to-do's" and live in these moments.  They are flying by.

2.  Joe: He is my best friend and knows me better than anyone else...and he sticks around, on purpose.

3. The weather:  No really...even though I would love some sunshine, my house hasn't flooded or been ripped apart by a tornado. A cloudy day...at least I won't get sunburned.

4. My friends:  I have some pretty amazing friends.  They laugh at my jokes, listen to my stories, give me advice, and just take me as I am.  

5. My bed: No seriously.  I love my bed.  It is a pillow-top and I still have my down-comforter on which is counter-acted with the ceiling fan running.  Joe got me new down pillows for Christmas that are amazing. I love my bed and I love sleeping in it.  I think I will take nap tomorrow afternoon.

6.  My job: I just heard the other day, officially, that I get to mentor again next year.  There were definitely challenges this past year, but I love the job and the flexibility it brings to my family.  I am excited for August to come and am more aware this year than ever how lucky I am to have a place to go back to.

7. Iced Unsweetened Green Tea: I am trying to eliminate diet soda and it would be impossible without my iced green tea.  My favorite is from Starbucks, but I can make a mean glass of tea at home too.

8. My list of 101 things to do in 1001 days: It is because of my list that I was able to stop myself on Wednesday and quit being so cranky.

9. My weight loss: I have accomplished so much in this area.  I am really proud of the steps I have taken to be healthier. I am grateful that I have the tools available to support me as I continue.

10. My home: It isn't the newest house and it probably isn't decorated the best, but it shelters us (and my really comfortable bed..which I am off to go see very shortly)

So there you have it....I will be cranky again.  You can count on it.  I don't trust people that are NEVER cranky.  The key, I think at least for me, is whether or not I can change it.  Yesterday, I proved I could.